While at a strip club, an announcer introduced the club's most popular and ever talented stripper, cleverly named Bacon, to the stage. It was not a human bacon but actual food bacon. It was wearing a cowboy hat and boots. People sitting at the front got hot and oiled up.
In real life, I made myself bacon. I should stop satisfying myself with heart attack food. I should also stop getting turned on by food, I have a boyfriend now.
That would be the sexiest stripper ever. Bacon, mmmm.
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